"to submit" vs "to let it be done"

I was re-reading something I wrote in the past, about something not being erotic to me anymore because I no longer felt that I was submitting to it, but rather just letting it be done to me.

Upon reading this, it occurred to me to wonder what the difference is in my mind between "submitting to something" and "letting something be done to me". Technically, those phrases mean the same things. Yet there is some crucial difference to me which affects me in a sexual and/or emotional way, so what is it?

I need to think about this further when I have time.

I have the whole week off, so I should have time for it, yet so far I've been busy busy busy. I've washed sheets, and washed clothes, and vacuumed, and shoveled shit, and tidied various things up, and gone grocery shopping, and ordered a tech item for Forestfen, and shopped for other useful things. I still want to rake the yard, finish vacuuming the house, dust the house, cook the rest of the pumpkin, set up the tech item for Forestfen, and various other things.