![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
I made it to bed by 2am two days in a row after having set that bedtime as my goal. On the 3rd day I got to bed by about 2:30am. The 4th day... I don't remember. I wasn't sleeping better for going to bed earlier, so the goal stopped feeling worthwhile. I only really made it my goal for that first day anyway.
Today... it's 2:30am and I haven't started getting ready for bed yet. I've been on vacation this week, otherwise I wouldn't be staying up quite that late anyway. Oh gr, tomorrow is my last day of vacation. Today is. Oh yuck yuck yuck.
It's hard writing when the right words don't come. Like the word for sticking to a goal. Not stamina. Not will power. Perseverance? Whatever. I don't seem to have it anymore. I tend to quickly lose faith in any action that I have to repeat over a long period of time. course of action?
Like with the DHA/EPA oil. I have stopped taking it daily. Up until now, I was intentionally ignoring the extra 100 calories of oil I was ingesting each day. Maybe I wouldn't gain weight from it. But a few weeks ago looking in the mirror, I couldn't stand it anymore. The flab on my thighs is definitely more than it used to be, even if the scale only shows a few pounds higher. 5 pounds. About what one could gain from an extra 100 calories a day over half a year. I don't want to continue for another half year and gain another 5 pounds of flab. What good is the oil doing me anyway? Nothing that I can tell.
And the compresses and eye drop... still trying to do it at least once a week, but sometimes slipping.
Today... it's 2:30am and I haven't started getting ready for bed yet. I've been on vacation this week, otherwise I wouldn't be staying up quite that late anyway. Oh gr, tomorrow is my last day of vacation. Today is. Oh yuck yuck yuck.
It's hard writing when the right words don't come. Like the word for sticking to a goal. Not stamina. Not will power. Perseverance? Whatever. I don't seem to have it anymore. I tend to quickly lose faith in any action that I have to repeat over a long period of time. course of action?
Like with the DHA/EPA oil. I have stopped taking it daily. Up until now, I was intentionally ignoring the extra 100 calories of oil I was ingesting each day. Maybe I wouldn't gain weight from it. But a few weeks ago looking in the mirror, I couldn't stand it anymore. The flab on my thighs is definitely more than it used to be, even if the scale only shows a few pounds higher. 5 pounds. About what one could gain from an extra 100 calories a day over half a year. I don't want to continue for another half year and gain another 5 pounds of flab. What good is the oil doing me anyway? Nothing that I can tell.
And the compresses and eye drop... still trying to do it at least once a week, but sometimes slipping.