Darkoshi

I was looking at a section of code at work today for a long time, without it making sense to me. I had a headache, too. Then I finally figured out why it was coded like it was and felt better.

But until then, it was an unpleasant feeling. A feeling I get once in a while, especially when comparing myself to other persons who appear to be smarter/faster than me at certain tasks. Maybe I'm not as intelligent as I used to be. Maybe my thinking skills are deteriorating with age. This must be what it feels like (for example) for people who aren't good at math, when they have to take math classes in school. Your brain hurts, and it doesn't make sense, and you feel stupid. Mental skills aren't really something you have much if any control over, just like most other skills. It's just luck that you have them.

It might be somewhat easier figuring out code, if I had trust that it must somehow make sense. But sometimes I finally figure out how certain code is working, and it turns out to be coded badly, and it is just an odd coincidence that it even works. So when I'm looking at code, I am never really sure if there is any sense behind it or not. But even when it doesn't make sense, I know the rules of programming, so I feel like I should be able to figure it out.

It would be nice if the code were commented. Sometimes I write down my own comments on the code in a separate file of my own, in case I need to come back to that code again in the future. No sense in having to figure it all out again later.