Fantasy Pirate League

[darkoshi]

Since yonmei did it... and since pirates are one of my favorite thingsies...

My Fantasy Pirate League, by Darkoshi age 33 and then some:

CAPTAIN: (because I sure as heck don't want to be in charge of this motley lot!)
Pippi Longstocking - She's a natural-born pirate, oh yes she is!!! And she's got the gumption, enthusiasm, and positive energy to lead my motley crew!

FIRST MATE:
Jack Sparrow - Because! He's the bestest pirate ever!

SECOND MATE:
Legolas - sure, he's an elf. But I think he'd make a good pirate, too. And he'd keep us from straying into evil activities.

THIRD MATE:
Xev/Zev - if we set anchor by a mysterious and forboding looking island, she'd explore it for us!


COOKS (2):
Doctor Who - (any or all of them). Of course they wouldn't want to be stuck on a pirate ship all the time, but with the Tardis, they could zip in and out whenever they felt like it, and could bring back munchies from other dimensions for us all to eat!

Neelix - because he can cook! (And in case the Doctors forget to return with those munchies)


TRUSTY CREW (12):

Lando Calrissian - He's charming and smooth-talking. He'd be our diplomatic officer in charge of dealing with hostile enemies.

Raistlin - ummm.... just because having an evil wizard on board might be fun.

Darth Maul - to keep Raistlin company!

Joxer - He could keep us entertained in the evenings by composing rowdy sing-along songs for us!

Cyndi Lauper - Because pirates just wanna have fun!!

Darkoshi - well, even if I'm not captain, I do still get to be part of the crew, don't I?

Grace Jones - umm, yeah. She'd make a beautiful mean-looking pirate. I'm trying to keep the gender ratio onboard a bit balanced; have you noticed?

lessee... who else... **brain is beginning to ache**...

[5 other stunningly perfect visions of pirateness]


CABIN BOYS:
Tao (from Beastmaster) - well, he's cute.

Hermione Granger - well, she's smart and sensible.


SURGEON/DOCTOR:
Julian Bashir - why not?

Comments

[tiniago.livejournal.com]

Hello! I have come to look over your crew with the appraising eye of one horse dealer assessing another's wares. Or something. Your crew is ace. Pippi Longstocking is a particularly fantastic choice. Oh, Pippi. And Legolas! Hee! Fussiest pirate ever! He'd just hang off the topmast all day looking pretty and singing and doing his nails! And ooh, Raistlin. He could be abrasive to the rest of the crew, and do spells and things, and get chest infections because the sea air doesn't agree with him. And yum, Lando. And Cyndi Lauper! Omg! Your pirate ship would have a genuine 80's pop theme song! Genius!

[darkoshi]

Yes! Legolas, with his keen elven eyesight, would be the perfect crewmember to be up in the crow's nest keeping watch! And you never know, the ocean air might do Raistlin good. Or if not, surely Julian could do something about that horrible wracking cough of his. Why, and I bet Hermione would be eager to learn a thing or two from Raistlin...