(no subject)

[darkoshi]

I am unhappy.
I don't know what I want.
I can't think of anything I would want.

I don't know what would make me feel good.
I can think of things that would make me feel bad, but not good.

I don't think BDSM can make me feel good anymore.
Does that imply it made me feel good in the past?

Short little spikes of feeling good.

But I don't think it can do that anymore.

My mind can't create the good feeling.

I went for a walk in Georgia once.
And scratched my sign by a trickle of water.

I went for a walk in Massachusetts,
and cried in the rain.
Or was it snow?

I went for a walk in the desert once,
but it is gone.

I don't feel about this
like I feel I should feel.

I don't like penises and scrotums and vulvas.
I still don't like them.

Maybe tonight I'll dream
a wonderful feeling.