Darkoshi

This song captures the agony of unrequited limerence very well:


Video title: Vikki Carr - It Must Be Him (1967)
Posted by: MrAkdnt
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-qgHOQ1ofg
Date posted: Nov 25, 2017


Song lyrics (It Must Be Him)

Wikipedia entry for the song (It Must Be Him)


Andrew Rannells did a more humorous version of the song, as part of his performance at the Lincoln Center:

Video title: long tall boi andy does a stretch: the song
Posted by: peachiii
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UeRbgfg-5I0
Date posted: May 18, 2018

Does the term "sexual attraction" necessarily indicate a desire to engage in sexual activities with the object of one's attraction? I mean, ignoring any logical reasons not to do so (eg., already being in a relationship with someone else, or not wanting to get pregnant or impregnate someone else, or not wanting to have sex with someone until you know them better, etc.). Given that there were no logical reasons not to, does it indicate a desire to engage in sexual activities? (Where sexual activities are defined as contact between the other person's body and your groin area, or vice versa.)

I've been calling it sexual attraction, that rare, special feeling I sometimes get in response to someone else or in response to reading something, even though it is not a desire to engage in sexual activities. So, perhaps using that term is misleading, and I should not call it that.

I also call things erotic for me, even though they do not result in me desiring to engage in sexual activities. Is that also a misleading term to use?

The kind of reaction I get seems sexual or erotic to me, because it has, at least once, involved sexual nerves in my groin area and/or having certain parts down there swell. On one occasion, I felt butterflies in my stomach. Generally though, it is a buzzing/tingling/inner vibration kind of feeling throughout my core, along with a mental feeling of intense contentment and/or glee.

It'd be like having my strings strummed, if I had strings.

Is it more apt to call these kinds of reactions "romantic attraction"? Some asexuals say they feel romantic attraction towards other people. But I don't have a good idea of what "romantic attraction" means either, other than in this case, liking someone without necessarily wanting to have sex with them. It is even less clear to me than what "sexual attraction" is. In my mind, the word "romance" conjures images of candle-light dinners and people drinking wine and wearing silky clothing, and things like that. That doesn't seem related to attraction. So is there any kind of special mental/physical reaction to feeling romantic attraction to someone? Or is it not much different than just finding someone fun to be around?

How often do you feel sexual attraction to someone? (Or, if not to someone, to something?)

If it occurs often, does it vary in intensity, and if so, how often do you feel a strong sexual attraction?

How does the attraction make you feel mentally & emotionally? Does it put you in a good mood? Does it make you feel excited?

Do you think your life would feel significantly different, if you did not feel sexual attraction to anyone or anything?

Do you ever refer to yourself as "we" or "us" when talking or thinking to yourself (eg. "Let's go to the bathroom now") even though you don't in general consider yourself to be more than one entity?

Have you noticed that certain black rubber products have a strong offensive odor (like used automotive oil)?